Yesterday we figured out that we need to:
- Remember WHO you are.
- Remember HOW you best express yourself.
- Remember WHY you came here to do all this.
And today I’m doing this.
1 . Remember WHO you are.
All you have to do is tune within, and ASK.
I’ve touched upon this several times over the years, and it’s time to touch upon this again.
Go into a meditative state. If music helps, put something nice on.
Speak directly to your soul, or contact your higher self, or your guides if that’s what you prefer.
Then ask this question: In 3 words, Who am I?
+++ DO IT BEFORE READING ON (I don’t want to influence your answer) +++
My answer is: I am Creative, Intelligent, and Kind.
EVERY time I do this exercise (and I do it every few months), I receive the same answer. Sometimes I get the word “nurturing” instead of kind. Semantics. No biggie.
This is who you are. You can think of it as your archetypes, with the first word being your main type, the second word being your secondary type, and the third word being your tertiary type.
If you like, you can go into more depth of each word, and ask for specifics. I don’t do this, because I already understand exactly who I am when I receive my response.
But, just for fun, I will do this for my first word – Creative.
So… In 3 words, What does CREATIVE mean, in this case?
You are an artist, a musician, a toner.
OK. That sounds weird. I’ll explain it for you: Artist is the umbrella term here. Musician is the specific artform that I AM (I was going to say excel best at, but it’s not even that. It’s simply who I am). Toner is someone who tones. Does that make sense? I create tones. They are sound frequencies. They create ambience. I express the ambience in tones.
VERY INTERESTING. Because Yes, this is what I have been doing, PARTICULARLY over the past 3 years, but embracing it more consciously over the past year.
2 . Remember HOW you best express yourself
Same deal – Get into a meditative state, and simply ASK.
So I’m going to be real upfront an honest here. I have NOT had this conversation with my self before. What I am revealing now is the LIVE UNEDITED version.
I STRONGLY advise you do this exercise yourself FIRST before reading ahead. I would HATE for my words to overly influence YOUR words.
So… HOW do I best express myself?
You are a visionary sound artist. This means that you see and feel and hear frequencies. Not just the tones or the colours, but the actual waveforms. The actual frequencies.
You LOVE to express how you FEEL.
YES, you have suppressed this for pretty much your WHOLE GODDAMN LIFE, and THIS is why things have always felt HARD. THIS is why you DON’T do well trying to talk about your feelings. THIS is why you rarely have WORDS for your feelings. Because there are no words. There are tones. There are images. There are shapes and colours and waveforms and frequencies in every way you can imagine – even in ways that your human brain does not comprehend.
And when your human brain (not just YOUR human brain, but THE human brain, in general) cannot comprehend things, it shuts them out.
Like science. You’ve never been sciency. Your brain just doesn’t comprehend that kind of stuff. Your brain is more abstract. More lateral.
So you spent many years of your human life shutting out emotion, because you could not understand it. You could not rationalise it. You did not have the words for it.
All you had was sound and colour and line and shape. (OMG as I type this I realise YES, this is SO true.)
So when someone ASKS you how you’re feeling, you clam up. You shut down. You break down. You Just Don’t Know.
When you have to have a conversation, you always clammed up. You shut down. You didn’t know what to say. You thought it was the introverted tendency to avoid small talk, but it has always been more than that. You just didn’t have the words.
All you had was sound and colour and line and shape. (Another realisation – no wonder I’m highly clairaudient and clairvoyant.)
And when you have all these big feelings, and you don’t know what to do with them, where have you always turned? To sound and to vision. Of course.
So when you feel like a lone wolf in this world, when you feel like the black sheep in the crowd, when you feel like you never fit in, it’s because of this. You express yourself best in sound and colour, and trying to fit into a world of verbal communication Just Doesn’t Work. (Another side note: No wonder I’m so drawn to intergalactic codes. They make more sense speech.)
Ok.. So I get it now. Sound and colour.
But what about my writing? I think I’m pretty good at that, if I do say so myself.
Writing is different to verbalising
Writing takes just that little bit longer for the words to come from your soul to your heart to your mind to your fingers to the page or screen. This process allows a few nano seconds more for the translation to come through – the translation of your expression. During the translation process you are able to visualise the situations, the symbols, the signs etc, and you are then able to find the words to translate these expressions and messages. Speaking does not give you this advantage.
Ok. I SO get it now.
This feels like Me.
This IS me.
And I UNDERSTAND now, that if I surrender to who I am, EVERYTHING can and will be SO much easier – BEYOND what I can even currently imagine, let alone comprehend.
And also – I’ve learnt nothing new. I’ve simply opened up the door to come home.
Stay tuned for the next part in this – Remember Why You Came Here.